First meditation

I had never meditated by using a candle in the dark before, and I have to say it was interesting to see the results.

Initially, I sat back in my comfortable love-seat, and I knew after only a minute or so that that was not going to "work." I do not find meditation to be as effective if I am lying down or sitting back in a comfortable chair.  So, I sat forward without any support for my back. I did, however, allow my forearms to rest on my thighs. It did not take long to realize that I felt both comfortable and alert in this position.

The flame was glaring for a while, and that may have been because my eyes had not adjusted to it at first. I noticed that it almost hurt my eyes to stare at the flame, but I think that all I did in response was perhaps sit back a bit.  After some time, the flame no longer hurt my eyes, but I had some sort of nervous tick going on with my eyes, and I found it distracting because it was diverting my visual focus. This continued for a couple of minutes, and it gave me the opportunity to take my focus off of the frustration with my eyes and put it back onto the flame. Eventually, the lizard-flick of my eyes stopped, and I was able to concentrate on the flame.

One of the more interesting parts of this meditation for me was that I eventually got to the point where I was fully focused on the flame, and I found it remarkable that it almost seemed I was looking at a picture of a burning candle. I would not have imagined an unmoving flame beforehand, but what I was seeing was exactly that. My intellect kicked in an noted that that was such a cool symbol: the flame was still and burning brightly just as my spirit, at that moment, was still.  By the way, spirit, to me, has a very broad meaning. It does not necessarily equal the word soul, but it could. For me, spirit is a great word for describing one's overall essence at a given moment. It is not a scientific word, and it is not meant to be. The still flame, for me at that moment, was emblematic of my still spirit.

I felt an intense peacefulness during this meditation, and it came when I had the experience I will call "the great release," until I come up with a better name. At some point during my meditations, my core muscles relax to the point that my lungs stretch far beyond their normal range, I a take a breath that seems to stretch my entire torso. When I get to this point, I know I have achieved some key biological benefits. I also, though, feel these benefits in my mind, because, generally, when I have the great release, I also am in a state of "no mind." I borrow the phrase "no mind" from a film called The Last Samurai. No mind is an amazing feeling, because it is almost like sweeping out the debris that was cluttering my thinking mind.

After this meditation, I went to bed very relaxed, and I am pretty certain that it made my sleep better.  I also woke up relaxed and focused. I was surprised that the feeling lasted throughout my sleep.